Medicare and the Windsor Decision

Just read something interesting this morning on the "Diverse Elders Coalition" blog.  This Q&A provides the latest information (with links) about changes for Medicare recipients as a result of the Windsor decision.  When we were domestic partners, Jane had been told that Medicare was first in line for coverage and my work insurance was second.  Now that we are married, my insurance covers first.  This is a good thing as she has remained on my insurance (even Cobra while we have been on our trip).  We have excellent coverage through my employer.
Here is the link to the information:  http://www.diverseelders.org/2014/06/25/medicare-the-windsor-decision-where-do-we-stand/

Seattle: Where Gay and Grey Lead the Way

I recently spent an afternoon at Senior Services in Seattle, thanks to Sally Friedman who is a Caregiver Advocate there.  Sally and I have been emailing for a few months and I have been looking forward to meeting her and hearing about what is happening for LGBT seniors in Seattle.  Sally started working at Senior Services in 1990 so has a great deal of experience and expertise.  She provided some history and a glimpse into the future for senior housing here.  

Sally

Sally invited Paulette to join us for our afternoon meeting.  Paulette has been active in the LGBT community for several years and is very involved in the transgender community here. After a successful career in a health-related industry, Paulette decided to go back to school (Antioch) and get a degree in clinical counseling.  Given what I learned from Paulette in our hour-long interview, I think she would be the perfect person to develop and present training on the needs of transgender seniors for senior housing staff members.  I enjoyed talking to both of these dedicated women.  They have helped make Seattle a wonderful place us to be who we are as we age.

Paulette

Utopia is in Seattle!

I think I've finally found Utopia! Today was a great day of discovery and enlightenment.  We went into Seattle this morning to spend the day checking out senior housing communities.  While meeting with administrators at the Ida Culver House, I learned about a Senior Care Providers Network that has been working on this issue for over 10 years.  Check out their logo and web site (below).

Imagine you are an LGBT senior.  Think about how it would feel to walk into a senior housing community with that logo on the front door:

If you go to Quail Park, a beautiful new independent and assisted living community in Lynnwood, Washington (just north of Seattle) you will see this sign posted proudly as you walk to the main entry.  I spent about an hour at Quail Park, talking with the Community Relations Director.  This place walks the talk.  I'll have more details soon about the senior care network in Seattle, but for now, I'm just thrilled to know that somebody out there is doing more than talking about this! 

Quail Park Fountain and Entry

Hey! It's Whidbey Island!

Soft Sunset from Whidbey

We visited an assisted living community on Whidbey Island today, one of a number of senior communities owned by an Oregon corporation.  The full-color brochure asks:  What does retirement perfected mean to you?  It goes on with a list of characteristics for potential residents to check off:  exceptional food, a feeling of home, safety and security, simplified life, etc.,  and then asks:  What would you add?  Of course, I would add:  welcoming and inclusive of all people including LGBT.  Although "diverse" or "welcoming and inclusive" was not on their list, it seems that this community, according to the staff member we spoke with, would certainly be welcoming of LGBT seniors.  In fact, she seemed rather surprised that this was a topic of concern.  (Some background here -- this administrator was a millennial who grew up on Whidbey.)  When I asked the question, "Would we, as a married couple, be welcome here?" she responded with a shrug and a rather surprised expression, "Hey! It's Whidbey Island!" In other words, it is accepted and expected that LGBT are comfortable here because we comprise a hefty percentage of the population on Whidbey.  Are there LGBT living in this senior community now?  She couldn't say for sure because their forms don't ask.  

Here is another example of a senior community that believes it is welcoming and inclusive but has no evidence to confirm that statement and, at least from what I could tell, no easy way to find out if it is true without talking with someone who has experienced living here.  Some of my suggestions for ways that the facility could demonstrate inclusivity were well received but with the caveat that such changes couldn't be made by someone who is a small cog in a big wheel.   With assurance, she said she would share these ideas later today in a phone call with her supervisor.  

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.  -- Margaret Mead

Living on Whidbey Island

Ferry from Mukilteo to Whidbey

The minute I get on that ferry, I feel like I am home.  After 13,000 miles, we are finally on Whidbey Island, our home-away-from-home at my brother's house.  Although the "Sis Suite" here is small, it is 10 times bigger than our RV.  We have our own bed, bathroom, washer and dryer, kitchenette, living area, and we can actually move around without stepping on each other or one of the dogs.  We've taken a week or so to adjust to being on solid ground.  After cleaning out the RV we washed clothes, paid bills, took a cruise on Bro's boat, volunteered for a beach clean-up, and took a few bike rides to our favorite spots.  This has to be the most beautiful place we've seen since leaving San Diego (the view of the Olympics from our patio is posted below).  Really.  Whidbey is heaven on earth!  Just don't tell anyone.  

Getting back to the research -- On Monday we attended the Whidbey PFLAG meeting and were pleased to learn that this year they have been focusing on issues related to LGBT seniors.  What a coincidence!  I shared what we've been up to in our travels. Members of the group made some great suggestions and provided contact info for this area.  They are interested in the project and want to stay informed.  I think the Northwest is the perfect place to get something started and I am so happy to have connected with this great group of caring and concerned Whidbey PFLAG members.   More to come!

View of Port Townsend AM

View of Port Townsend PM

Good News!

The Palouse hills on the edge of Moscow

To all LGBT older adults:  Looking for a carefree senior community that is affordable, beautiful, provides the services you need and entertainment offerings you desire AND is open and welcoming to LGBT?  Check out Moscow, Idaho!  Right here in this sweet university town there is a senior community that is worth a visit.  Jane and I were there a week ago and met with one of the administrators.  This community is loosely affiliated with a Christian church so it does have a sense of being a religious-based facility, but according to the person in charge of community relations, the administration of the national office and their facility are welcoming of same-sex couples and LGBT single people.  They want us to be a part of their community.  This lovely facility in Moscow provides independent and assisted living with a variety of options to fit your finances.  The surrounding wheat fields reflect the season change.  There are big trees, beautiful gardens and paths for walking around the property.  You are within a mile of downtown and shuttle buses provide transportation to everything you would need.  The weekly Farmer's Market is large and a popular place to spend a Saturday morning.  And the bonus?  With two universities within seven miles, there are plenty of educational and entertainment opportunities here.  

Are they prepared for the LGBT baby boomers in the Moscow area that are likely to be living there in a few years?  Maybe not  as much as they could be but the willingness to listen, adjust, adapt and yes, change how they operate to include LGBT is definitely there.  My final question to the administrator:  What would it take to put something on your web site and your marketing material that indicates you are LGBT welcoming and inclusive?  The answer:  I don't know but I'm going to find out.  

For all the LGBT in the Palouse area, this is good news.  You are so fortunate to have this senior community that is saying, "Come on in!"

Old Friends

Rebecca and Theresa

I treasure my friendship with these two women who live in Moscow, Idaho.  Rebecca and I go WAY back.  We roomed next to each other our senior year of college and lived together as partners for seven years.  Maintaining friendships with ex-partners isn't always possible but I am certainly happy that Bec and I have remained close for 40 years.  Rebecca and Theresa have been together for 22 years.  We were witnesses for their marriage in San Diego, pre prop 8.  They were both with us in December when we hosted a wedding celebration in San Diego with our close friends present.  Bec performed the ceremony and added her usual wit and wisdom!

Rebecca is semi-retired but still works as an artist (potter) and is very active in the LGBT community and local politics.  Theresa loves her job at a local university and has many opportunities to travel overseas with her position.  She is also an accomplished gardener and has recently paired her passion for flowers with another talent, painting beautiful watercolors.  They both love living in Moscow.  Their circle of friends is large and encompasses people they have connected with as a couple through their Unitarian church and through their individual interests.  

As Rebecca and Theresa see other members of their family and friends age, they too are thinking about the "what next."  Fortunately, for them and for other LGBT in Moscow, there is a wonderful senior community that is open and welcoming.  More on that in my next post!

Their garden